Likewise, I have met many bellicose evangelical protestants and catholics who have stood in the position of the Owl constantly--with the others were always wrong. These people never matured mentally, morally, nor spiritually--decade after decade.
Finally, whole countries I have visited, such as the Philippines, Japan, Kuwait, or Germany, seem to praise the head-in-the-sand approach to bad governance, bad civil servanthood, and bad communication--rather than seriously even discussing the moving the society onto higher levels of communication and love.
Once one has analyzed the patterns of one's parents or loved ones, one will certainly recognize the unhealthy patterns each of us have adopted with our spouse and coworkers, too. In short, we need to know ourselves and the formative patterns in our lives and discuss them with our partner: What are our "unhealthiest" tendencies in a pinch?
LEVELS OF COMMUNICATION
In another early chapter, Chapman reviews the five levels of communication. These are identified by Chapman as (1) Hallway Talk, (2) Reporter Talk, (3) Intellectual Talk, (4) Emotional Talk, and (5) Loving, Genuine Truth Talk.
The first level is more of a level of curt formality. For example of this routinized formality, (I will share a joke. ) This sort of routinized formality is very conspicuous in Asian and African societies. When I was in Japan, this formality was joked about with the following anecdote:
Mika broke her leg as she was skiing in the Alps. She lay in the wet snow curled up and crying, i.e. wrenched in pain. The ski medic arrived on the scene. He asked her anxiously, "How are you?" as he bent over Mika and noted that Mika had a compound fracture.
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