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OpEdNews Op Eds    H4'ed 12/2/12

Laugh With Me

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Message Mark Sashine
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'To laugh is  proper for a man'

F. Rabelais, 1500s

( It is all not real, folks, But  you never know:)

1.New banned author.  Robert Sheckley, the  famous  science  fiction  author is banned in the US because of one short  story 'The Guard Bird'. In that story humans unleashed mechanical police birds to protect lives from those who wanted to take those. The birds would  strike the  presumed assailant  with electric shock and if he persists- they could  even kill him. At first it was  OK, the  murder rate dropped. But then the birds defined  life as anything that moved and  functioned. They started to kill farmers to protect crops and  people for switching off lights or turning off cars. Desperately, the engineers unleashed  new flying machines, the  Hawks with only one purpose- to KILL the birds.  Eventually the Hawks found out that there were other creatures to KILL too. The book is banned in the US.

2.  In  the new  apocalyptic scenario 'Zombie-land'  on the Discovery channel the dead people rule the  world and watch the  TV- series 'Walking Humans'.

3. In the TV -series  'Life After Humans' two  new topics  are  repeatedly  perceived:

-that with time the environment without  humans becomes more and more suitable  for humans
- that  even  in 300 years after humans  the Israeli and Arab dogs  will still fight for  the  territory in the former Jerusalem


4. Ambassador Susan Rice when asked about the events in Benghazi paraphrased  her boss, Hillary Clinton:

- He  came, we screwed,  he died.

5.The  CEO of  one of  the biggest banks when questioned in Congress invented a new  English word- IDONOTRECALL.

6.  New order of inauguration. According to some sources President Obama will be delivered to the Inauguration Ceremony by a drone.  The  drone then will barrage  over the site  just  in case.

7.Following Edgar Poe. As Congress and President  prepare to squander Medicare and  change the eligibility age to older, the program will now have a new name-Nevercare.

8. Foreign policy. President Obama  is going to nominate a new Secretary of State. That most likely  will be his old Secretary- Bird.

9. Compromise.   As  people in  Washington are pushed to compromise about the fiscal cliff, they have decided to follow suit: all Dems had decided to quit their  party  and  join the GOP.

10,  Victorious  Feminists.  Apparently  a big % of women was elected to public offices  at the last elections.  In Congress they will form  the  feminist caucus.  Their first  bill is called  'Don't ask, Don't  tell'  bill, which will forbid  to define  gender in any way, ask about it, whatever. The words  like  'man', 'woman', 'boy', girl', etc. are to be abolished.  All peoplle will be called ' persons'. Mankind  will be renamed  into  Personmean.

To laugh is proper for a man. Laugh with me, folks.

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Mark Sashine Social Media Pages: Facebook page url on login Profile not filled in       Twitter page url on login Profile not filled in       Linkedin page url on login Profile not filled in       Instagram page url on login Profile not filled in

The writer is 67 years old, semi- retired engineer, PhD, PE. I write fiction on a regular basis and I am also 10 years on OEN.

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