Ukraine's Bandera Propaganda: It's All Putin's Fault

Putin did it!
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Everything is Putin's fault. Blame Putin"

As Ukraine totters on the brink of all-out war, from one insufficiently long cease-fire to another, Washington's tacit agreement for Kiev's resumption of hostilities against the breakaway republics in its southeast may be partly due to the fact that the information it relies on is being generated by a press officer who only just turned eighteen, yet appears to have been given free rein. This is borne out by a recent press release by the speaker of the Verkhovna Rada of Ukraine, Alexander Turchynov, admitting that Kiev''s security agencies systematically misinformed the country's leadership about Russia's possible military intervention, which never happened, in order to ramp up the situation.

"Our intelligence agencies reported about ten times a month that the Russian's had alrady chosen the time of their attack - usually it was at three or four in the morning. We sat in combat readiness at the command post... as the rest of the army prepared for war with the Eastern neighbor. But it didn't happen," Alexander Turchinov said in an interview with Novoye Vremya.

For months we've been hearing about Russia attacking Ukraine. Russia was at the border. The great Russian Horde was galloping over the border on bears. And for just as long we've been held spellbound by the pearls of wisdom dispensed by the always witty and well informed Jen Psaki, who assured us that the intelligence President Obama was acting on was coming directly and reliably from on the ground in Kiev.

For weeks, CNN, the Daily Mail and every news outlet from the Guardian to the Wall Street Journal and Yahoo kept announcing that Russia was going to attack, while we waited for Ivan to remember where the border was and cross it. Russia didn't cross the border, but the blitz stories continued anyway: Russia was attacking.

With every outlet piping in unison, it makes a whopper of a great story, until someone looks at the border. When NBC looked at the border , it came to the conclusion that Russian troops were invisible. While news agencies were retracting stories because they didn't find them, Secretary of State John Kerry and President Obama assured us there were troops at the border because they said so. But based on what Turchynov now says, real intelligence and hindsight tell us we've been ramping up sanctions on Russia for no good reason other than a guy building a career who wants your sons and daughters, husbands and wives to go to Ukraine and fight and die for Bandera so he can get a FaceBook like or two. More about him later.

If you are reading this, Obama's sanctions are hitting home in the US and you may be out of a job yourself soon for no better reason than Washington's super-secret sexy social media intelligence.

Sourcing Obama's Retarded Intelligence

Intelligence gathering in Ukraine has been a three-part effort. The US has the most formidable intelligence apparatus in the world, but apparently shut it off. Why use satellites, drones, or people you trust with binoculars actually pointed toward the border in question, when you can have people that want to start a war with Russia instead? Apparently the NSA, CIA, and other acronyms were busy looking through underwear drawers on and off the internet and couldn't be bothered. The EU, through NATO and the OSCE, have proven themselves to be just as unformidable intelligence-gatherers - relying on Kiev.

The Best Military Intelligence In Ukraine

Earlier this year, the head of Ukraine's SBU (formerly the Soviet KGB) Valentyn Nalyvachenko announced that Kiev would replace local and regional governments, police, military officers, advisers et al based on the new person having the "right ideology." This means a deep commitment to Bandera Nazi beliefs.

An example of the desired profile is Dimitri Tymchuk, whose Moskal finding abilities are becoming legendary. He runs a Military Blog, where he is depicted weariing an army helmet, a flak jacket and a palm tree to show how serious he is about intelligence. According to him, Russia invaded with tanks on June 13:

" If anyone still has any doubts that this is a blatant invasion by Russia, I would like to see this individual. It would be interesting to see what the embodiment of naivete looks like."