I've avoided the debates until now because I saw them as little more than exercises in media manipulation. This time, I wanted to watch the Republican debate just to hear the other candidates respond to Ron Paul. Unfortunately, I had a scheduling conflict so I asked a kid to take notes for me. As the debate began, I drew a quick seating chart of the candidates to help the kid keep track of who said what and then ran off. BTW - this is not snark. This is a straight rendition from a 9 year old. The only changes I made were for spelling errors (except the names).
It must have been more difficult thant I thought to keep track of all the new names. That's the only reason I can think of to explain why this reporter devised their own naming strategy to keep track of the candidates. Aside from that, it seems they got all the high points.
Follow me below the fold for the 9-years old rendition of a fight between Sarge, Wrinkles, Bunny Ears, Oily, Beagle Eyes and Carrot Face...
They are rude
Interrupt alot!
Beagle Eyes
Arrogant foreign policy
We need 400,000 troops
Don't let politicians get involved
Leave it to military with blood on their boots.
Carrot Face
President policy good
War good
Patriot Act good
Electric snooping good
Capturing Saddam mistake
Surge mistake
Clinton peace dividend bad
We need more troops
We need more ships
Wrinkles
Constitution has 10 Amendments
Immigration is bad
Secure border from immigration
Sarge
Bush right
America is safe
America is not safe
America is safe
Rumsfeld failure
Petraeus is good
Strategy was bad
Now it is good
Sarge is confusing
Bunny Ears
We are bullies
Policemen
If not listening we bomb them.
If listening we give them money.
Oily, Wrinkles and Carrot Face are making fun of Bunny Ears.
Carrot Face
Olympics got attacked
Fight. Fight. Interrupt. Fight.
New topic
Healthcare best in the world.
War funds for health care
10% inflation
Inflation needs to be under control
Oily
They don't need Hillery care?
Bunny Ears
People go to India for heart surgery
airplane + hotel + surgery = 50% of cost in America.
People don't have health insurance.
Wrinkles and Oily fighting about man dates.
Oily says man dates are ok sometimes.
Wrinkles doesn't like dating men.
Fight.Fight.
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