Article: Republicans' First 100 Hours...Waylaying the Dems

The corporate media and the Republican company spokespeople have three main priorities this week: fracture the democrats, attack Democratic stars and mythologize Republicans and George Bush as underdogs taking cruel and heavy assault from a rogue band of radical grass-smoking, tree-hugging, bra-burning, latte-drinking hippie liberals.

The strategy never really changes. Republicans, via their corporately owned media, always essentially give the American people an ultimatum: "At the end of the day, you are either a flaming homosexual and support the Democratic Party, or you are a real man and support us. What's it going to be?"

The Corupublican Party has touted itself as the pro-guns, pro-death penalty, pro-military and anti-homosexual/bisexual/transgendered/cross-dressing/body-pierced/freak defenders of liberty. How do you know it's a Republican issue? It's very easy to defend in the company of Buba. It's as infantile and devoid of intellectual stimulation as an argument over the front seat of a car.

Let's begin with Operation Fracture the Democrats.

Here is the conventional wisdom among Republicans. (I know Republicans who talk about messing with the psychology of politicians in the way I am about to describe.)

The Republicans know that Democrats are not as fractured as the corporate media would have us think. But that doesn't matter. The corporate media ditched facts, honesty and balance a long time ago. "But," Republicans think, "if we can brainwash Americans with the falsehood that Democrats really ARE fractured, then the politicians will get scared and jump ship from their own party! YES! Then we can SLAM them for jumping SHIP!"

Rush Limbaugh is a strong proponent of this psychological tactic. He employed it yesterday, using a metaphor that perhaps helps us to understand why the man's history is strewn with the wreckage of THREE divorces. Although extremist Christians and the FCC love Rush no matter how foully he pollutes the airwaves, I am going to add a disclaimer to the following Limbaugh quote: it is not suitable for children.

Limbaugh invoked the black and Hispanic caucuses as two examples of obstacles between Democratic hopes and reality. No bill, Limbaugh implied, would pass until every divergent interest group within the Democratic Party ripped it to shreds in a giant tug-of-war.

Then he said (and I quote verbatim, so look away kids) "If Pelosi thinks the Senate is going to bend over and grab their ankles for her, she's got another thing coming."

Strange sexually dysfunctional implications aside the message to the people is essentially: Democrats are SO FRACTURED!!!

This narrative can be seen even in state newspapers. In Oregon, Democrats won control of the state House, Senate and governor's office last November. Two days ago the Oregonian ran a front page headline that read, "Legislative Democrats Not Exactly Team Unity."

Here is the calm, cool and completely unbiased first paragraph: "It's been 16 years since Democrats simultaneously controlled the Oregon House, Senate and governor's office. But for those who think Portland liberals will rule the day, here's a reality check: Oregon Democrats don't all think -- or vote -- alike."

One note: apparently the term "Portland liberals" is like the equivalent--in local terms--to the unsavory label "Northeast liberals" that Washington Republicans so often invoke when they scare the country with el Diablo-esque caricatures of Democrats. ("Salem liberals" are almost as bad, but they don't wear Birkenstocks.)

The article just gets worse from there.

And finally: Wiping Out Democratic Star Power.

Limbaugh again features prominently in this category, this time in two ways.

First he's taken to calling Nancy Pelosi, Nazi Pelosi. Big yawn there, right? Who's going to hold Limbaugh accountable for comparing the House leader to the man responsible for the Holocaust, in which 6 million people (mostly people with a different faith than Hitler and homosexuals) were killed?

Second he's attacking Obama for...you guessed it, the Illinois Senator's admission that he used drugs as a young man. I know that you are thinking, "Nah, Limbaugh? Drug user and abuser even as a 50-year-old? He surely can't be attacking Obama for indiscretions at about the age when nearly every college student in America is making an ass out of him or herself with drugs and/or alcohol, can he? Obama's not even as old as Limbaugh and he still has more years of straight behavior under his belt.

How can Limbaugh possibly hope to disgrace Obama by attacking him for drug use? How can Limbaugh try to sink Obama for behaving two decades ago the way Limbaugh was behaving two years ago at least.

Three divorces, drug use and an addiction to nicotine plague Limbaugh's history and legitimacy. One is tempted to feel sorry for him until he lashes out at victims of Parkinson's Disease, or other drug addicts or former drug addicts.

In the end, their tactics will fail. They have become too predictable. Americans are sick of their games. It won't fly this time around.