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Bush Asserts Having New Medical Condition in NBC Nightly News Interview

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"I don't feel in a bubble" Bush confided in the interview, a revelation surely to alarm White House medical staff and intrigue scientists all over the globe. People will be waking up tomorrow wondering, is the condition neurological in etiology? Is it psychological? Does the President not feel only certain types of objects or feelings while in a bubble, or is it a complete lack of tactile and emotional feeling?

An attempt by the President to answer many of these questions fell somewhat short when he said "I mean you feel in a bubble in the sense that I can't go walking out the front gate and you know, go shopping, like I'd love to do for my wife". After this portion of the interview, Al-Jazeera received an immediate communique' from Bin Laden in which Osama took direct responsibility for placing Bush in said non-feeling bubble and warned not only that other western leaders could find themselves in bubbles as well, but that Al-Qaeda had many different kinds of bubbles they could use against western governments.

Such talk has armed force commanders all over the world discussing the bubble gap they have with potential antagonists. Pentagon spokespeople cautioned that even though Bush has discussed his medical problems, and a group has claimed responsibility, they have no proof as to where the bubble actually came from or whether 'more bubbles might exist out there'. Nevertheless, the chairman for the joint chiefs informed reporters that an additional appropriations request (groovy government parlance for 'Request for more money') would be submitted by him to congress to explore the development of sophisticated bubbles as well as an anti-bubble shield. Bush assured reporters that, while he still can't feel in his bubble, he would sign the appropriations bill that ensured that "America retains the best bubble force in the world" and "would build an anti-bubble shield that would protect us from rogue nations using bubbles against us."
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A political blogger for the International Business Times, Steve Leser is a hot national political pundit. He has appeared on MSNBC's Coundown with Keith Olbermann, Comedy Central's Daily Show with Jon Stewart and Russia Today's (RT) Crosstalk with (more...)
 
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