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When I was born, my parents placed me in a small wooden boat and pushed me out into the center of the Pulaski Skyway where I was rescued and ultimately raised by a pair of opposums. Sadly, they died when I was very young. At least I think they died.
From there I joined the Merchant Marines and was the only toddler in World War II to sink a Japanese battleship while being burped.
When I returned to the states, I got a job at Gimbels Department Store and have been there ever since even though they went out of business in 1986. I have always valued loyalty over money and if that's wrong, talk to my wife. You'd get along famously.
OpEd News Member for 662 week(s) and 3 day(s)
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