the creation of more jobs.
The government will be moving itself to Aruba in order to save energy costs.
The tanks on the street and in front of your houses are to protect you from the homeless and ungrateful folks. They are running on solar energy to avoid greenhouse gases. They will be firing recycled bullets of depleted uranium. This should save some bi polar bears.
The elections will be canceled because of the gravity of the situation.
All citizens will be issued Vaseline in the event their asses hurt.
Be brave and proud of yourselves for almost electing the first black president. Remember Americans have always come through and recovered from whatever circumstances their inept corrupt government thrust them into. God bless America!
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