Running for president of the United States is hard work. Gathering facts, presenting a consistent message, and staying on point during debates is more hard work. Let's face it, work is hard. But why work when you can smirk?
Take it from me, Donald Trump. I don't let factual arguments bog me down. When I get called on my positions, I don't fall apart when I can't remember what I stand for; I blow off my detractors with a well-placed smirk, and you can too. I'll show you how!
My experience has proven that facts are irrelevant. Why bother with accuracy when you can attack the messenger? It's easy! It's fun! And best of all, it's effective. Enroll in "Don't Work--Smirk!" my new course at TrumperyUniversity. It's great, like me!
You'll learn:
- My famous Trump smirk.
- Twenty insults for any occasion.
- How to use humor to deflect real issues.
- Subterfuge for fun and profit, and more!
Read this testimonial from an enthusiastic believer in the "Don't Work--Smirk!" course:
"I love the Trump smirk! It repeatedly saves me from having to craft a reasoned response. Just recently, I used it during congressional testimony along with my favorite Trump phrase, 'I'd like to plead the fifth.' I followed it up by insulting Congress. Trump's course helped me hone my smirking skills to rock star status. It will work for you, too."
--Martin Shkreli
But wait, there's more! You'll also receive a CD full of other great lines you can use to your advantage, like: "I never said that." "I have more money than you." And my perennial favorite, "I'll sue you!" The "Don't Work--Smirk!" course--get it today for 35 small payments of only $999.99!
Remember, nothing says, "I'm a winner and you're a loser," better than a silent smirk. Act now and we'll send you this valuable bonus pamphlet, "How to be a Demagogue in 5 Easy Steps." Get yours today!