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But we're too cowardly to admit it. Instead, we pretend what really chaps our asses is that cheater A-Rod. Him and octo-mom. We argue about a ten-point swing in the tax-cut-to-spending ratio of the stimulus bill like it mattered. Comments fly across the screen, radio hosts foam like hydrophobics, Anderson Cooper promises to "keep them honest."
Well, folks, honestly. Every day a little more of the earth is being swallowed up by global slaving and the UN is quiet. They would say something, but they're busy right now. Some Jews built a home on the wrong side of the desert.
That's the reason these poor, insulted Islamists are so obstreperous. If it wasn't for the crimes of Israel against the Palestinian people, the Taliban would be hosting the Vagina Monologues right now. Try to understand. Their pride is so hurt they just can't help themselves. They have to treat their women like heifers to build up their self-esteem.
Above all, be cluck, tolerant, and hey, how about that George Bush, cluck cluck, wiretapping cluck, Guantanamo, cluck cluck, extraordinary rendition, cluck, no cluck war cluck for oil cluck cluck cluck.
Yes, I know those things are wrong. I'm a liberal just like you, let's stipulate that all our abuses are inexcusable. But I was wondering:
Do female dogs have to cover up in the Swat valley too?
Does sharia law allow for a flap on the burka, or must one hike it up to pee?
Are the plans for the Swat Valley Hooters on hold for now?
Don't laugh, that could be you someday, or your sister or your mom. As long as we're too chickenhearted to call a spade a spade and a slave a slave, preferring instead to take shelter behind the feeble walls of cowardice thinly disguised as tolerance. Because it feels safer (it's not) and seems easier (see above.)
'm not stumping for yet more wars. My visceral disgust with the middle-passage mentality of the Taliban in particular and radical Islamists in general is not a neo-colonial manifesto or a call to a new crusade. It's not our war and it's not a war we can win, even in Afghanistan. It's their war, and Pakistan just surrendered an important fort. At the very least we ought to let them hear about it.
But, before we do that, we ought to let ourselves hear about it. If we can hear over the squalling of octo-mom's fourteen kids, her agent and publicist, that is.
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