This conversation and my article have focused largely on race because that's currently where the need is. But across the board, it's vital that we expand our networks to people who are different from us in a wide range of ways--in terms of religion, political affiliation, sexual orientation, age, physical ability, even body type. The narrower our circles are, the narrower our lives are, and the narrower our minds become. Research has borne that out repeatedly, but it's also apparent personally if you look closely enough at yourself.
JB: Agreed. Thanks for sharing this aspect of your personal life with us. I have to ask: in light of the way people, particularly men, of color continue to be treated by the police, are you fearful for your foster baby boy's safety and wellbeing? If so, how are you and your husband handling that?
AA: Oh, we're hoping it won't be a problem by the time he's a teenager. Ha, kidding. I'm assuming it will indeed still be a major issue, but we haven't gotten to the point of really thinking about that yet. It seems so far off. However, we're hoping to enlist someone, or several someones over the years, who can serve as a mentor to our foster son--a Black man who can teach him what it means to be a Black man in this society. Not that we're planning to outsource the task of teaching the boy what to expect, but I think the input of someone who's been there will be extremely valuable.
JB: Makes sense to me. What else would you like to talk about before we wrap this up?
AA: I'd like to simply underscore how powerful it can be when people from different backgrounds get to know each other. The "contact hypothesis" is one of the most well-established theories in social science; it shows that people fundamentally change--on an emotional level--when they mix with and get to know people who are different from them. They become more compassionate, basically--and that's something we desperately need in this era of siloed lives. Personally, I'd like to see a lot more of us voting with others in mind and supporting policies that benefit others. And in my mind, this is the best way to get us there.
JB: Simple but profound. Thanks so much for talking with me, Amanda. It's been a pleasure.
AA: Likewise!
***
From Amanda's website:
I'm a freelance writer based in Durham, NC. I write about gentrification, poverty, religion, communities, and the people who interest me for a range of local and national publications. I also help nonprofit organizations advance their missions with a variety of writing tasks...
I have a bachelor's degree in biology from the University of California at Berkeley and spent several years in my twenties working on farms and traveling around the world, sometimes on a bike. I still ride a bike everywhere and am an avid dancer and meditator, as well as the mom of a small boy.
The Yes! article I read that led me to Amanda
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