This is unusual. I am sharing a dream I had last night. In older indigenous cultures it is the nature of big dreams to be shared. Big dreams can be big medicine. Plus, we are living in an unusual time.
Healed by a tree - a big dream
A large tree is lying on the ground.
It is just the trunk of the tree
From just above the roots
To right below the first branching,
Perhaps about 30 feet long and a few feet thick.
I am with some people who have gathered to learn something
From a shaman / healer. The shaman has some assistants helping him.
(I am a with the group to learn but
We are encouraged to help.)
We are being shown how to ritually make a cut into the bark lengthwise
From the top of the trunk to the base,
Dividing the trunk in half, but only deep enough to strip off the bark
Of a lengthwise section about a foot wide.
This is done and is going well until the bottom is reached
Where the trunk widens and divides the body of the tree.
The shaman has us move the cut to reflect the widening of the tree trunk,
And the stripping of the bark continues.
The strip of bark is easily removed.
Then there is a scene shift.
I am screaming uncontrollably like a panic attack.
(This might be after I shifted my position (in real time) because of a sharp cramp
Over my left chest that makes me uncomfortable in bed
And to which I associate my heart
But I am awake enough to know
That my heart is not distressed
So I let the dream continue.)
I am screaming and screaming in my dream without relief
And the focus is all on my head
Which is like a caricature of my head, slightly enlarged and distorted.
My head is where the scream is coming from.
While I am screaming there are those around me who are concerned
But are helpless to calm me down. I am completely out of control,
And in the dream I am watching myself.
I have no clue as to what is upsetting me.
My distress is sort of a knee jerk response
To everything, as if a tipping point had been reached.
Also I am a smaller version of myself, sort of compact
And a little dwarfish, with my exaggerated head.
Then I discover that I can insert my head into the space of the tree trunk
Through the opening we created by stripping the length of the trunk.
Then I enter into the interior space of the tree with my whole body.
There is plenty of space inside.
I do not feel cramped.
It is an earthy space. If I had to assign a color to the air in the tree
I would say it is brownish but a pure, clean atmosphere,
And there are no discernible walls or circumference to the space,
And yet it is obvious that I am inside the tree.
I can walk there, so I walk around a little. .
I am still screaming but more experimentally now
Because I am noticing that the sound of my scream
Doesn't carry here, but is muffled and softened to nothing.
But along with the muffling of the scream is the
Total cessation of the anxiety that produced it.
When I am in the tree trunk I am in a space that is calm and calming
I stop screaming and I begin to walk around.
Inside the tree my anxiety is completely gone.
When I wake, I am still in the tree.
