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Governor Andrew Cuomo: Day One, Everything Freezes

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Carola Von Hoffmannstahl
Message Carola Von Hoffmannstahl
And so it begins. Not with a bang but a brrrrrr. On January 5th, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo laid down his first State of the State address in a freezing cold auditorium at the Empire State Plaza Convention Center in Albany. The space wasn't frigid by accident. Some like it hot, but Andy does not. According to a Cuomo minion quoted in the New York Times, walk-in refrigerators are his thing. The "meat locker"* temp at the Center drove some older legislators to wrap themselves in blankets. Which apparently are kept handily at hand in the Empire State Plaza linen closet.

Imagine the scene as seen from the podium by Andrew Cuomo! New York's most venerable reps (some of whom have held office since the daze of Rip Van Winkle) huddled in blankets like refugees, their blue-lipped faces upturned in a mass mask of rapt attention.

None the less, the clapping for Cuomo was somewhat subdued - folks feared their fingers might shatter.

Another big chill: Cuomo's inaugural address in the State Capital on New Year's Day. The evening before, his office ordered that the windows of the room where Andy would speak be kept open all night. Whether or not the heat was turned off in that room, or the rest of the building, during those hours is unknown. It's also not known if Cuomo counted how many blankets were returned by the venerable legislators after his frosty State of the State. My guess is yes - the heat was snuffed and the blankets counted. Andy has promised to cut waste and spending and protect New York taxpayers. He's also promising to deliver a "new reality"**. Hopefully, the latter won't include a New Ice Age.

Personally, I get nervous when pols use such godlike terms. Ex-Governor Eliot Spitzer was big on holy pronouncements. Most famous: "Day one, everything changes." On Spitzer's inauguration day, New Yorkers got up bright and early. Couldn't wait to see the sun rise in the west. Alas. No go. But not much more than a year later, everyone in the USA got to see Spitzer go down in the east.

While campaigning Andrew Cuomo took care to distance himself from Spitzer; keeping his control freak tamped down (most of the time) and vowing not to be planning any big changes for "day one". His choice of residence as governor is in keeping with that vow. Like the last three governors before him (including Eliot Spitzer) Cuomo won't be living full time in the Governor's Mansion in Albany. His main digs will be downstate, where most of the state's money lives.

Some Albanians were disappointed by Andy's choice, seeing that he implied otherwise while campaigning. They should be heaving sighs of relief. The Mansion is an old historic building. Four years or more of open windows on winter nights would destroy it. Then there's the havoc that the frozen water pipes and lines would wreak on the nearby sidewalk and street. Plus, if Andy were to hang in the mansion full time his significant other, Sandra Lee, might be tempted to go on a decorating binge. Anyone who's seen her holiday "tablescapes" on the Food Channel knows what that would mean. Think pink pink pink and acres of frou-frou. The graceful old manse would wind up looking like a semi-homemade pop tart.

Back to Andy's love of the freeze. Why is a mystery. Sure - some unkind people say his eyes have a shark-like quality. And that his political ambitions keep him circling endlessly, without sleeping. But I don't believe for an instant that Andy is a secret Great White who needs the deep chill and wants to swallow smaller fish and rip the limbs off unlucky surfers. My guess is that the New York Times reporter had it right when she suggested Andy may like cold rooms 'cause they keep audiences alert. When I heard his State of the State on the radio my windows were shut and the heat was on. After about 10 minutes of Andy's fifty minute speech, I was feeling sleepy very sleepy!

Carola Von Hoffmannstahl-Solomonoff
Mondo QT

*Going to an Event Featuring Cuomo? Take a Coat, or Maybe a Blanket, Elizabeth A Harris, New York Times, 01/06/11

**"Cuomo outlines new reality", Jimmy Vielkind, Albany Times Union, 01/03/11

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After several years of NYC go-go dancing and wacky radical fun (including a trip to the 1968 Democratic Convention in Chicago) Carola Von H. became a No Wave band leader and Mail Artist. Picking up change as a free lance writer. Her pen ranged (more...)
 
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