Article: Moron Warning

This articul is particularly for those who don't understand the anger that builds up from having taken and failed or under-achieved on college admistion tests. This fury can be called SAT ire.

Our editorial team is considering a new policy-- including a moron warning when an article requires a modicum of intelligence to be understanded. After receiving complaining emails from angry, offended people who have read and misunderstood articles which were meaned to be funny, or which expected a reasonable awareness of current events, we are considering instituting this policey. At the least, this article will be included in our FAQ.

Of course, our challenge is that anyone coming to this site will not consider themselves to be a moron. Therefore, this article will help you to determine whether you are at risk.

If you read an article about someone who took the tests for college and is now angry (SAT ire) without understanding it, you might be at risk.

If you have, let's say, half or quarter a modicum of intelligence, or, if you are unsure, there are a variety of ways you can ascertain your intellektual capasity. For example, when you receive emails from Nigeria, or elsewhere in Africa, offering you a share of millions of dollars of money that someone, recently deceased squirrelled away, do you seriously consider telling anyone about the email, or do you follow the instructions to keep it secret?

If you are put in a room with a bathtub and given a cop, a bowl and a thimble, how do you empty the tub? Using the drain, of course.

And then, there is the most obvious question. On election day, was Sarah Palin your favorite candidate?

If you've gotten a clue that you are among the tiny fraction of people who, upon reading this brief warning article, experience the sub-college level anger -- SAT ire-- then we would strongly advise you to avoid reading the rest of the articles on the site. Your existing state of mind may be put at risk. Continued reading could cause adverse reactions including:

-Intense disagreements and arguments with like-minded family members.
-Guilt and regret.
-Frequent self name calling, such as, "how could I have been such a f*cking idiot?"
-Loss of friends who thought the same way.
-Increasingly prolonged episodes of intelligent understanding of old history with new perspectives.
-Conversations where you admit deep stupidity and idiocy to people you used to hold in contempt

PS. If you are getting ready to email me or comment on my spelling, you've flunked the satire test. I'm just pointing this out to save you the time and embarassment. If you didn't figure out all the misspellings were intentional and part of the plan of the article, you need to work on your funny bone. You are taking things too seriously.