Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis demanded today that "woke" Hurricane Ian reimburse residents for billions of dollars of damage it inflicted earlier this week.
At a press conference, the governor insisted, "We won't take any s**t from that woke hurricane."
He also announced that he "shipped the migrant hurricane out of Florida to parts unknown."
When pressed by reporters, DeSantis said, "I just punked you. I ain't saying where I sent Hurricane Ian. But he won't be messin' around with the Sunshine State any longer. That's for sure."
Impertinent reporters then asked the governor about his record as a congressman. In 2013, newly elected, he opposed funding to support victims of Hurricane Sandy. That hurricane ravaged parts of the Northeast.
Now, almost a decade later, DeSantis wants the federal government to provide billions of dollars of relief to Florida residents and homeowners.
"Yeah, I know I opposed the so-called 'credit card mentality' in 2013. But this is a new decade. And I represent the Free State of Florida, the freest state in the nation."
DeSantis added, "We love the federal credit card now, y'all. So, let's go, Brandon, I mean Biden. Print money, borrow it from China. Whatever it takes. And remember, we're all in this together. We're the United States of America."
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You can make donations here, below:
Donate to Disaster Relief | American Red Cross
Emergency Response | Coast Guard Foundation (salsalabs.org)
Thousands need emergency cash assistance after Hurricane Ian slams Florida's coast (care.org)
Hurricane Ian relief: How to donate, volunteer and more (wptv.com)
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This article first ran at Humor Times. DeSantis vs 'Woke' Hurricane Ian - Steve Schneider, Humor Times
(Article changed on Oct 04, 2022 at 11:56 AM EDT)
