1. Without a Democratic Congress Obama may not get the support he needs to continue the drone bombings that target terrorists and kill innocent children who are so stupid as to be anywhere near them. A Democratic Congress will ensure Obama can finish this war "over there' and save us from terror at home.
2. Only electronic eavesdropping can save us from the enemy within. Obama has made a permanent commitment to expanding secret eavesdropping on US citizens. Obama needs this extra judicial power in order to fight the terrorists at home. Only a Democratic Congress can guarantee that we keep trading civil rights for the sake of security.
3. The Department of Justice has finally become an extension of political parties and elected officials. After these hard fought gains have been won, if we don't return a Democratic Congress we risk going back to the old days of justice for justice's sake, something we cannot afford in today's modern world where following judicial precedent and hundreds of years of legal convention is just too time consuming and bothersome. We need a Congress ready to support the DoJ in expediting justice by ridding us of such nuisances as "due process,' Miranda Rights, and the silly useless mantra "innocent until proven guilty." And think of all the money we can save by avoiding those costly and time consuming fair trials.
4. If Democrats do not win this fall then habeas corpus could be reinstated. If that does not put the fear of god into you just think of all those innocent people that might flood our neighborhoods. Better to spend our taxes keeping them in jail as a reminder to anyone who ever thinks about being an honest and upright citizen.
5. Our jobs are in danger if Democrats do not control Congress. Others might repeal the Free Trade agreements that have created over 300 million jobs in China. If it is overturned we could get those jobs back here and then all those immigrants would start pouring over our borders in greater numbers. Better not to have any decent jobs here so we can discourage illegal immigration.
6. Democrats have done a marvelous job at protecting the Bush/Cheney/Rove gang from prosecution for their war crimes. They should be rewarded fro this great service to humanity. We want to ensure that Bush et al are never prosecuted for their crimes so vote for Democrats so this won't ever happen. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
7. Fabulously wealthy and powerful corporations, such as the health insurance giants have reaped windfall profits from Democratic Health Care Insurance Welfare Reform. Since average workers can only have a good life from the money that trickles down from the super rich, it is important to keep this corporate friendly legislation rolling off the presses. Only a Democratic majority can guarantee such benevolence.
8. Iran remains a threat to the entire world. We know they are just days away from having a nuclear arsenal that rivals our own. Democrats will provide certainty that the US will bomb bomb Iran. We cannot afford any other policy at this critical stage of our economic downfall.
9. Blue Dogs are certain to keep things just the way they are. We don't want anything to threaten our freedoms; freedom to get sick and die, freedom to be spied upon, freedom to pay oligarchs all our wages, freedom to be homeless, and freedom to have tea parties.
10. Finally, drill baby drill. We know that after eight years of trying Bush failed to lift the ban on offshore drilling. Obama accomplished this in one afternoon. A Democratic Congress will carry out Obama's wishes and re-open all our pristine offshore waters for oil drilling. We cannot be so blind as to squander this great opportunity. Drilling for offshore oil is fun for the family, peaceful and not too messy. It truly represents American values for which we must stand up and fight.
So if you still have any doubts about why you must vote for Democrats this fall then you must be some sort of conspiracy theorist, tree-hugging, enviro-freak, communist, pacifist.
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