A lifelong observant Episcopalian, Donald Trump was a young man when he first encountered the Reverend Norman Vincent Peale. Almost overnight, Peale's "The Power of Positive Thinking" became Trump's bible, which set him on a path apart from the rest of his fellow parishioners, for whom their bible was, well, the Bible. Always a "leap of faith" ahead of the rest of us is the Donald!
Bottom line? President has strongly made his opinion known on the subject of opening and filling to capacity our nation's houses of worship, regardless of phony fire marshal or deep-state doctor's "recommendations". On this point I am, once again, squarely in his corner.
Which brings me, finally, to the subject of political rallies. Let's face it, the president is the nonpareil reigning champion of soaring political rhetorical (not to mention hilariously irreverent) impressions of skanks, fatsos, and cripples. And while I don't always agree with what he has to say in this particular arena, I will defend to the death (not mine, of course) his right to say it. The fact is, no one can deny that Mr. Trump strongly has the powerful ability to strongly connect on a visceral level with even the most poorly educated of his adoring fans (everyone knows it; I know it, and YOU know it, too!). I, for one, can't wait for restoration of wall-to-wall network coverage of his mesmerizing rallies, especially when they preempt the "fake news" my libtard friends are so addicted to watching on MSDNC!
So let's recap, shall we?
President Trump and I both feel it is imperative that all televisions in MAGA households remain perpetually tuned to Fox News. That way, their owners will always know what the president is thinking. In fact, that's where the president himself goes to find out the very same thing!
The president and I also agree that when confronted with a particularly knotty problem (no, not a naughty one; that's HIS department, or should I say "his prerogative as an alpha male", right guys?), one should always search out the simplest, most unidimensional solution possible. Whether it's trying to decide whether or not to consume likely poisonous substances, or insert an uninsulated screwdriver into a light socket in an attempt to electrocute the coronavirus, stop long enough to ask yourself, "What would the Donald do?" Better yet, ask, "What in the world is this man doing?" Bottom line again? Just trust his judgment. Period. End of story.
And of course, he and I both agree when the topic concerns the wearing of cheap cloth masks that make you look stupid. If you can't afford the chic new all-but-invisible designer masks made by Ivanka (and you can't), the solution is simple: DON'T WEAR ONE! If any deep stater has the gall to ask you why you're not wearing a mask, simply laugh, look down your nose at him or her, and utter (with utter contempt), "What makes you think I'm NOT wearing one, you politically correct snowflake?!!" After all, how are THEY gonna know, right?
On the subject of religion, I assure you there is not a scintilla of daylight between our president and myself. Have you seen his recent proclamation that all churches, synagogues, temples, and mosques be opened forthwith, so they "mayeth be filled to overflowing with the teeming, swelling body of the faithful"? To that, I say, "Hallelujah, Brother!"
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