Miller adds that the vertical or hierarchical power-over model views power as a scarce resource and that competition for power naturally pits people against one another. In this condition, "little self/big other" hopes to flip the situation into "big self/little other." Fritz Perls used to call this dynamic: "top-dog and under-dog." However, relationships rooted in mutual power do not need to be based on these zero-sum assumptions; these premises do not have to apply to interactions between human beings. Through the experience of mutual empowerment in a clinical setting, a client can learn to transfer this orientation to other relationships in their life.
Relational empowerment creates conditions for an enlarged vision, deeper compassion and enhanced energy, which arise from a framework of emotional connection.
And is this not precisely what we need to become cultural change agents?
Conclusion
Riane Eisler's and the Stone Center's clear comprehension of the power-with/power-in-connection mode of being suggests an evolution from the love of power to the power of love. The Dalai Lama has said that now, for us, love is no longer a luxury. In terms of the survival of the human species it has become a necessity. We face an epic choice.
The skills just discussed - mutuality and empowerment - are the bottom line for extricating ourselves from the world-wide power-over predicament in which we find ourselves. It is possible to extrapolate from the two-person therapeutic relationship to larger venues - to learn to transfer the skills and wisdom we have gained into our larger web of relationships. No doubt this will take time - and sustained effort. With perseverance, courage and faith we can learn to apply these understandings to the national and international level, as well as to our daily lives.
If we are to avoid chaos and disintegration, there is no other way forward. This transformation will be a supremely challenging task.
Most are us are still in denial about the intensity of the challenges we will be facing, as we move into the future. Embracing a partnership ethos is no longer a luxury; it is a necessity.
I will end with this, from Andrew Harvey:
"The human race has no hope of survival unless it chooses to undergo a total change of heart, a massive, quite unprecedented spiritual transformation.
"Only the leap into a new consciousness can engender the vision, moral passion, joy and energy necessary to effect change on the scale and with the self-sacrifice necessary to save the planet in the time we have.
"The message we are being sent by history can be summed up in four words: transform or die out."
Andrew Harvey, Conversations with a Modern Mystic
World Dignity University How It Works Linda Hartling and Evelin Lindner
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