Momo Kapor lived two blocks from here. Ivo AndriÄ"¡ lived there. This shop with colorful ties was owned by the first openly gay man in Belgrade. It was a big deal then. This was the first Chinese restaurant. Although it was run by the government, it did have a Chinese cook. When Starbucks first opened, there was a line out to here.
There was a bar here, Dobra Kapljica. When I was three-years-old, an uncle would take me here and have me drink the beer foam. He also showed me how to bang on the table to ask for another beer.
For about a year during the 90's, inflation was so high that as soon as you got paid, you would run out to exchange it for some foreign currency, or you'd run to the store to buy whatever. At a restaurant, you had to pay at the beginning of a meal, because it would cost more at the end of it. Too many Serbs prayed to become billionaires, and it actually happened. Five billion dinars would get you one sardine out of a can.
When the Americans bombed Belgrade in 1999, they would sometimes announce their targets. Knowing Branko's Bridge would be hit, hundreds of university students converged on it every night, so it was actually spared. The Americans couldn't afford such a public relation disaster.
Here is the Monument of Gratitude to France, erected after World War I. As you can see, there are French and Serb soldiers, with different hats. When NATO bombed Belgrade, it was covered in a black cloth.
At the Belgrade Zoo, there's a small archway called "Monica's Strait," and there's a viper named Madeleine, after Albright.
When I was 13, my mother took me here for basketball practices. You know you're a nerd when you mother takes you to basketball practices. I was laughed out of the court.
How people curse is revealing. Novak shared with me some Serbian invectives, "Go f*ck your own picture," "I'll f*ck your bloody child," "May you kiss your father's cold forehead" and, to a woman, "May you find the taste of cocks disgusting." When someone farts, you can slap him with, "May that be the music at your funeral." A twelve-trombone send-off doesn't sound too bad"
Time for a joke?
"I heard this from an army major. It's a part of the army's brainwashing. Different nationalities were asked how many watermelons they could carry. Modest, the Hungarian said, 'I can carry one,' then the Romanian said, 'I can carry two, one under each arm.'
"The Bulgarian, he said, 'I can carry three!' Everyone objected, 'How can you carry three?!' 'Easy, one with each hand, and one on my co*k.'
"Then the Serb said, 'I can carry five!' 'That's impossible!' everyone shouted. 'It's easy. I can carry one under each arm, and the Bulgarian on my co*k.'"
In 2016, Novak returned to Belgrade to retire, only to resume working after a trip to Thailand. "My daughter was in Bangkok for a semester, I visited her and fell in love with Thailand."
Although Novak managed to get a well paying job there, he only lasted a year. "I got bored. How can you be bored in a city of ten million people? I don't know, but I got bored."
Back in Belgrade, he's still restless, however. "I may have a job offer in Hanoi."
"Have you been there?"
There was a bar here, Dobra Kapljica. When I was three-years-old, an uncle would take me here and have me drink the beer foam. He also showed me how to bang on the table to ask for another beer.
For about a year during the 90's, inflation was so high that as soon as you got paid, you would run out to exchange it for some foreign currency, or you'd run to the store to buy whatever. At a restaurant, you had to pay at the beginning of a meal, because it would cost more at the end of it. Too many Serbs prayed to become billionaires, and it actually happened. Five billion dinars would get you one sardine out of a can.
When the Americans bombed Belgrade in 1999, they would sometimes announce their targets. Knowing Branko's Bridge would be hit, hundreds of university students converged on it every night, so it was actually spared. The Americans couldn't afford such a public relation disaster.
At the Belgrade Zoo, there's a small archway called "Monica's Strait," and there's a viper named Madeleine, after Albright.
When I was 13, my mother took me here for basketball practices. You know you're a nerd when you mother takes you to basketball practices. I was laughed out of the court.
How people curse is revealing. Novak shared with me some Serbian invectives, "Go f*ck your own picture," "I'll f*ck your bloody child," "May you kiss your father's cold forehead" and, to a woman, "May you find the taste of cocks disgusting." When someone farts, you can slap him with, "May that be the music at your funeral." A twelve-trombone send-off doesn't sound too bad"
Time for a joke?
"I heard this from an army major. It's a part of the army's brainwashing. Different nationalities were asked how many watermelons they could carry. Modest, the Hungarian said, 'I can carry one,' then the Romanian said, 'I can carry two, one under each arm.'
"The Bulgarian, he said, 'I can carry three!' Everyone objected, 'How can you carry three?!' 'Easy, one with each hand, and one on my co*k.'
"Then the Serb said, 'I can carry five!' 'That's impossible!' everyone shouted. 'It's easy. I can carry one under each arm, and the Bulgarian on my co*k.'"
In 2016, Novak returned to Belgrade to retire, only to resume working after a trip to Thailand. "My daughter was in Bangkok for a semester, I visited her and fell in love with Thailand."
Although Novak managed to get a well paying job there, he only lasted a year. "I got bored. How can you be bored in a city of ten million people? I don't know, but I got bored."
Back in Belgrade, he's still restless, however. "I may have a job offer in Hanoi."
"Have you been there?"
Next Page 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6
(Note: You can view every article as one long page if you sign up as an Advocate Member, or higher).
